one liner jokes

1980 girls: Maa mei Jeans pehanungi
Maa : Nahin beti log kya kahengey ?
2006 girls: Maa mein mini skirt pehanungi
Maa: Pehen le beti kuch to pehan le!

Similarity between Gandhiji & Mallika?
Dono ne kapde tyag diye,
ek ne desh ke liye,
doosre ne Deshwasion ke liye!

Exams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya,
Kuch To Hua Hai Kuch Ho Gaya Hai,
Exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya,
Sab Kuch Alag Hai Sab Kuch Naya Hai

Judge: U r crossing the limits.
Lawyer: Kaun Saala aisa kehta hai?
Judge: How dare you call me saala?
Lawyer: My Lod, I said kaun 'Sa Law' kehta hai?

Bhikhari: Saab 1 rupaya de do.
Saheb: Kal aana.
Bhikhari: Saala is kal-kal ke chakkar mein is colony mein mere lakhon rupaye fase huye hain.

Generation Next Motto:
Na hum shaadi karenge,
na apne bachchon ko karne denge.

FOOL se, FOOL ne,
FOOLon ki FOOLwari me
FOOL ke sath wish kiya '
You are the most beautiFOOL,
colorFOOL & wonderFOOL amongst all FOOLS

What do u call a woman in heaven?
An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven?
A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven?
PEACE ON EARTH!

What's the diff between Dava & Daru?
Dava is like girlfriend,
that comes with expiry date and Daru is like wife,
Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.

A Chinese couple Mr & Miss Hua got twins without marriage.
What did they named them?
They named them as 'Jo-Jua', 'So-Hua'

Paani mein Whiskey milao ta nasha chadta hai.
Paani mein Rum milao to nasha chadta hai.
Paani mein Brandy milao to nasha chadta hai.
Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai.

Sardarji with Nepolian

NEPOLEAN: "In my Dictionary there is no word called 'IMPOSSIBLE'

Sardarji: "What's the use of saying it now,you should have checked it before buying !!

Jokes from India

1. Do you know why girls don't keep thier mobiles in shirt pocket?
B'coz can't get signals near hills & mountains

Do you know why boys keep thier mobiles in pant pockets?
B'coz signals are high near the tower….

2. Chemistry ke teacher ne Ek ladki ko poocha…
Teacher:: What are nitrates?
Ladki:: Ladki ne Sharmate hue jawab diya "2500/- plus hotel room bill"…

3. BOYS PLEDGE: India is our nation, Girls are our destination, Flirting is our Profession,
Dating is our Occupation,
to hell with our Education.

4. GIRLS POLICY: Fraud with innocent boys; Fun with Handsome boys;
Friendship with Smart boys;
Love with Faithful boys;
Marriage with Rich boys.

5. A 5 year old boy asked a pregnant lady: What is that? The lady told, "This is my baby and I love him very much". Boy: Then why did you eat him??

6. A girl and boy sitting alone. The boy started touching the girl. GIRL: Don't touch me, all this only after marriage… BOY: OK, call me when you are married.

7. Sardar was driving with girlfriend to Chandigarh. He puts his hand on her lap. She smiles and says, "You can go further dear". So, Sardar drives to SHIMLA.

8. A boy from third class asked his teacher, can a girl of my age have babies? She said, "What? NEVER" Boy told the girl sitting next, "See, I told you not to worry"

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